July 26th, 2017

   This week has been such a difficult one. I have never felt this way in my life. There are many different slang terms that missionaries use like "greenie" for new missionaries, "father" for the person who trained you, "birthplace" for your first area, and many more. One that I get told constantly is that I'm going to die soon, meaning I'm going to be ending my mission. I don't think until yesterday I fully realized how true that is. To end a mission is to have a part of you, I would suggest the majority of you, die. I feel that now so strongly after having my last interview with my mission president. We had a zone training day at president's home while interviews were going and it was an interesting feeling to see all of my close friends talk and train about how we can be better missionaries while I was looking at them thinking this will be the last time I will ever see some of them. Then when everyone left it was just the sister training leaders and us and we had a dinner with President and Sister Gubler and talked about the zone and then had our interviews. When I went in, all we talked about was home. We talked for a long time and he answered my questions and then he said thank you and talked about how he had seen me grow in the past two years and seen my service change me. When he was done I left feeling so sad inside because he made the end feel so real. I now feel the "death" approaching as if I have some sort of terminal illness wishing I could be cured and keep going but knowing it is my time. I have been given so much advice in the past few weeks from everyone I know about finishing a mission strong and about going home strong. It's been helpful and constructive but no one has helped me understand how to cope with the feelings that have now. The feelings that keep welling up and tell me that this will all be over soon and that I'll never be able to have these experiences again. I know going home will bring so much goodness and happiness but my heart feels like I'm dying. When you leave home to go on a mission there is a time you will return home to the same people and same place, but when you leave you mission there will never be a return date as a missionary.


   With all that depressing stuff being said I do feel at peace knowing that God has been happy with the time that I have spent here and the eternal friends I have been able to make. In the course of two years I have learned many lessons which range from small practical cooking tips to how to talk to God and recognize His voice talking back. I know that the lessons I have learned here will be a spring board to propel me forward for the rest of my life. Of all these valuable lessons learned, one that I am most fond of is that I have been able to gain a deep and real relationship with God. I have learned that He is very aware of everyone and His hand is in their life. His love is ever present. As I have served others I have felt God's love for people and it has worked within me to help me do things I couldn't or wouldn't do on my own. I have caught glimpses of the way our Heavenly Father sees His children and this has changed my heart. His love, which to me is made manifest the most through Jesus Christ, is the foundation of my life. His love has changed my desires which has changed my thoughts and my actions. That love He has for me is my testimony and it is the light in me that I will always try and share with others because I have seen that as I have shared that light. It fills others with light and increases mine. I love this gospel and know it is true and that through Jesus Christ we can overcome anything and receive the strength to keep going. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Love,
Elder Johnson

July 29th, 2017

   This week was a good one. It's been difficult at times coping with the knowledge that I'll be leaving so soon. I had my last zone conference which was weird. There were so many missionaries that I knew would be the last time I would ever see them in my whole life. Then after the conference president took the departing missionaries into a room and talked to us about leaving and how to prepare and work on this thing called "my plan." So yeah I'm now sitting here with one Pday left and it's an unbelievable feeling. On Sunday, just to put the last nail in the coffin I was asked to give my farewell talk in the ward... it was the last talk I'll ever give as a missionary. It was a good talk, probably my favorite I have ever given. I was the last speaker and spoke for 25 mins about what I learned on my mission. I got pretty emotional while speaking which doesn't usually happen to me which I think goes to show how weird of a week it has been for me emotionally. I wouldn't say it's killed me work wise in fact we have still worked quite hard and taught a lot but I have felt sad thinking that everything I do is my last time. On the other hand there is still a big part of me that doesn't believe I'm actually going home. Work wise we had a sad teach with Susannah which went well because we pushed for baptism a ton and she understood it a lot better but she isn't going to be able to be baptized in the next few weeks which is sad because I have been teaching her for so long and now it won't be able to happen but she will be baptized. The gospel has changed her a lot and she has grown so much because of it.

   Also had a good exchange with the Brighton elder and had a pleasant surprise at the temple while having exchange review. The worthing elders needed us to do a baptismal interview and afterwards we had a picnic next to a castle just because it's England haha I love my missionaries! They are such a blessings and have taught me so much as I get to spend time around them. Something I love about all missionaries is they have all made such a sacrifice to be on a mission and they all have lessons to teach you. God has blessed us all with talents and abilities and I have learned to learn about other missionaries talents and abilities which has helped me grow so much. This is a lesson I never want to forget. I love my mission.

July 12th, 2017

   This week was quite a spiritual and reflective one. There was a lot happening to be distracted about especially only have a 20 odd days left. I have my assignment to give a farewell talk in my ward next week which is pretty crazy too. But with that I have had very spiritual moments of looking back and feeling a sense of peace and accomplishment. We were able to spend a lot of time with other missionaries as well and I love the relationships I have formed with so many of them. The highlight of the week for sure was Alex.

   Alex's baptism was absolutely amazing!! We had to go the chapel at 6:45 to fill the font and get everything set up. We then went home got dressed up all fancy and headed off to the chapel to see a very happy and glowing Alex and his very nervous mom who had not been to church in a very long time. SO many people came to the baptism including Alex's family which was a big deal. The talks were given by a couple of the young men who he is close with and then he was baptized by THE Marcus Pelham. It was a very spiritual moment and Marcus told us afterward that when they got out of the font Alex said that he couldn't stop smiling and then he gave Marcus a hug and started crying. That was so good to hear. Then came sacrament meeting and his confirmation. The previous bishop who is close with Alex confirmed him and in his blessing said a lot of amazing things including that he will go on a mission. Elder Aguiar and I were jumping for joy. Alex is amazing and I am so blessed to know him. It's so cool how teaching people about the gospel has helped me learn so much about the gospel. It's a very productive cycle that when we learn we are able to teach and when we teach we are learning. And to see someone change and grow helps me change and grow so much too. To see Alex's almost glow on Sunday was such a blessing and an additional confirmation that I am doing the God's work and that he is helping me. This was definitely a high light point for me on my mission. To see a 15 year old who struggles daily to overcome the challenges he faces to then make a huge step towards Christ and commit his life to being His follower. It brings me a deep happiness to see this change happen in people's lives. 

   I love this gospel because it means I can always have peace. There are a lot of things in life that brings us down. I have been able to see these things way too many times in the lives of people I have been around as a missionary. And with the things that brings us down God, who is loving, has given us His Son to find constant peace when it can be so difficult to do on our own. It takes a lot of trust to get that peace from Christ but when we are willing to make changes to our life we can have that peace. It has been so enlightening to directly see that work with people I am close with and then to apply those same principles I teach into my life. It works and I can't live without it.

July 5th, 2017

   Well time is wrapping up and I officially have less than a month. This Sunday was fast and testimony meeting and as I was sitting there thinking and listening to people I realized that it was my last fast Sunday as a missionary. I bore my testimony and said that it was my last fast Sunday and it didn't hit me or feel like that at all. Then yesterday we had MLC where people from all over the mission get together and this time it was at president's home in his backyard. It was a good time but when we were leaving I realized it's going to be the last time I see half of those missionaries ever again for the rest of my life...I still don't feel like I'm leaving and my brain and heart are in constant conflict when I think about it.

   The week itself was pretty amazing. We had such a blast with all the people we are working with. We were able to find a few new people this week but the best things we did were with Susannah and Alex. Susannah is growing in the gospel. She came to church on Sunday and then we took her to the temple visitors center where there was a fireside being held. At the fireside a former temple presidency member gave a lesson on how to study the scriptures. It was so so so good!! And Susannah really seemed to enjoy and received some great ideas on how to improve her scripture study. She really wants to come back to the temple again too.

  With Alex we have been prepping him for his baptism that is going to be happening this Sunday at 9:00 am right before church which starts at 10:00. Our bishop suggested we do a Sunday morning baptism so that's what we are going to do! I'm pretty excited for all of it to go down. We have been Skype teaching him the past couple of nights just to go over things so he is totally ready and his interview is tonight which he is going to pass with flying colors. He is so grown up and mature for a 15 year old. While going over the interview questions we asked if he believed we have a modern day prophet. He said he doesn't know if the Holy Ghost told him that is true yet. Him saying that to me just shows how ready and prepared he is to be baptized because he isn't 100% sure about the doctrine but is willing to act on the faith that he has and make changes in his life that he hopes will lead to a knowledge. I love him!

  A great miracle that happened for me this weekend was a post that Alex Veloso (the 14 yr old I baptized last year) put up on facebook. It was his one year anniversary of his baptism in Sunday he expressed his gratitude for joining the church and he bore a small testimony. To me that is the most amazing thing in the world. To see the gospel have a lasting effect in someone's life, especially a youth who wants to serve a mission!!!! Having a glimpse of how the gospel has impacted someone's life is one of the greatest feelings I have ever experienced.

June 28th, 2017

   This week hasn't been anything crazy eventful, but just lots of really fun and also spiritual experiences. We got to help this young couple paint their house. We also got lost looking for a house and ended up wandering through a forest for over an hour.. so that's always exciting. In the mornings we still play tennis for exercise, and I think we are getting pretty good considering we don't hit nearly as many balls over the fence! Haha

   Alex is doing great and is so prepared!! We had a lesson with him and asked him to prepare a part to teach us and his mom and he made these little note cards and they were so well prepared and spiritual! Love that kid. Susannah is doing well and we are hoping to reset a date with her for the end of the month. She is moving a bit slow and steady at the moment. And then we are teaching a Romanian man who is really interested but works on Sundays so we are working with our ward mission leader to find him a new job.

   Something that has struck me this week has been the simplicity of the gospel. It's so interesting how foundational and fundamental the principles of the gospel are. The past couple of weeks, Elder Aguiar and I have spent hours in our studies focused specifically on the Doctrine of Christ. We teach people about these simple steps that will bring them the peace or the happiness or the hope that they are looking for. And yet, we can sit there for hours talking about and learning about how it all works. How does our faith help us? Why do we need baptism? What does the Holy Ghost do for us? There's so much to learn! And yet, at the end of the day, it all comes down to our efforts to follow Jesus Christ.

   I have spent lots of time reflecting lately. It has been quite interesting how much being at the end of my mission has had an effect in the way I think. I hear a lot of people say, "I found myself on my mission." I don't understand that phrase at all because I'm always right here. Haha but as I look back through my journal or pictures I see that a lot of growth has taken place. In someways it's very hard to tell if I have grown a lot but in others it's more apparent. I love my mission and can't believe I only have 5 weeks left...

 chocolate meringue cookies

 made savory pancakes with scrambled eggs and cheese

hay fever has been beating the crap out of me lately...

June 21st, 2017

What a crazy week!

   So Elder Christofferson came to our mission on Saturday and it was unlike any mission conference I have ever experienced. It was in Stains which is an hour and a bit drive on a good day and we had the Guernsey Elders staying with us too so there were 5 of us and we had to leave at 6 to make it to the chapel and have a good seat. The conference was normal to start. President and Sister Gubler bore their testimonies, then an area 70 spoke, and then Sister Christofferson (she was my favourite). They were all pretty short talks. Then Elder Christofferson got up said a few words then opened up the room to a Q&A. No one knew it was going to be a Q&A so no one had time to prepare questions which made it suck at points because some missionaries asked terrible questions to an Apostle. Questions like how can we follow the Spirit or how can we be consecrated. These questions received a very text book answer that President Gubler,  general conference, and the scriptures has taught us 100 times. It was as if people wanted him to give a different answer then what we have already been taught. But some good questions were asked one being how can we "pray always" when we are trying to listen or speak. Christofferson explained what it means to have a prayer in your heart as Christ taught us. He explained this means to always have the desire to know the will of the Lord and to obey. Something I loved is he answered every question (other than two) using the Book of Mormon. He would listen to the question, give a remark about the question, open a scripture and teach a principle from it, then give a personal experience regarding the principle taught by the scripture. It was a really cool teaching pattern I noticed. I asked a question that was a bit eye brow raising for President Gubler but made Christofferson laugh. It was, "How can we and how have you handled receiving council or direction from a leader that you don't agree with?"  He laughed and then said well I better not answer this. The Stains Stake President was invited to answer it and gave a really sincere answer about us praying in humility and always seeking for clarification from the Spirit. It's usually pride that causes us to feel like a leader is wrong. Then Christofferson spoke. He taught that leaders are not perfect and will give imperfect council but usually mistakes of leaders are not material meaning they have no lasting matter. If they are they can push the question up all the way up to the prophet. They usually get the unanswerable questions. For us we shouldn't bother. If it is a mistake by a leader don't get offended and be patient. He was really funny and open about his answer. The conference was a good all in all and he ended by giving us an apostolic blessing which was interesting and very unique. I loved it!

   We taught Alex this week while I was on exchange with Elder Cloward who is one of my best friends. It was so good to be able to randomly be with him again because he is serving on an island called Guernsey but because of the conference he had to come a day early. Alex is doing great but we had to push the date back so we could get all the family to come so now he is getting baptized on the 9th of July!! He is solid though!

   Susannah just got back from Brazil and after talking to her we are going to have to push her date back again but she is still good. The work has been a lot of fun and we are working loads with less-actives too. There is a man named Paul who is single and in his 50s who is so good to the missionaries. Because he doesn't really have family we went over to his house and made him dinner for Father's Day. It was so good to be with him!

   After the conference, Elder Sullivan who was serving on Guernsey went into a tri with us and his companions went back to the island. He went home on Tuesday and he couldn't fly back for just a few days so we got to keep him. It was cool to talk to him about going home and so weird that I will be there in 6 weeks. Oh how time flies. On his last night we didn't have a DA so I marinated some chicken and we bought a little disposable BBQ and made rice and mac salad and we had a picnic BBQ in the park for him. It was so much fun. I love serving through food!!

Well the mission is going so good and I am already starting to miss it. I can't believe it's my last transfer. I am so glad that I get to stay here with Aguiar and I feel so good that I get to keep serving the people here in Haywards Heath for my last little bit. I love it here and love being able to serve. Elder Christofferson in his apostolic blessing blessed us that if we are unsure about how God feels about us and our efforts as missionaries that we will be able to know clearly. As I have been pondering that I have felt more and more that the Lord is pleased with where I am at and what I am doing. I truly love this work.

June 14th, 2017

  This week was a blast! Some highlights we had from this week was Elder Aguiar had a procedure that is a temporary fix to his situation. He essentially got it drained and now he is back to being a normal human being haha he was in a lot of pain that day but he is fine now! On the work side of things Susannah is still in Brazil and will be till the the 20th. Alex got permission from his dad to be baptized so we had a lesson and talked all about baptism and the importance of it and then set a baptismal date for the 25th of June which is two weeks away!!! Alex was excited and wasn't nervous at all. His mom on the other hand seemed nervous so we asked her why and she said it was because now this means Alex is eventually going to have to go on a mission haha she loves her son and is very supportive! And Alex is such an amazing young man. We had the lesson in a park and afterwards we taught Alex how to do a backflip so he was literally so happy he was doing backflips haha. 


  Me and Elder Aguiar have been doing so well and have been full of excitement for the work! A few missionaries who go home the same time I do have been getting really trunky and dying hard. I always joke with them that my trick has been that I have always been trunky. But the closer I get to the end I think the less I want to go home. I have an ever growing appreciation for the blessing a mission is. We are given an opportunity to serve full time and we receive so much in return. I love the people I have been able to meet, the friendships I have formed, and the ability to make friends quickly with anyone that missionaries seem to have. I love how close I have come to God and how my understanding of Him has become much more clear. I love being a missionary for Jesus Christ. An example to illustrate my point is something that happened to us the other night. We had a spare 45 min in the evening and because things didn't go to plan as they never do so we thought of who we could visit. The name of a part member family we hadn't seen at church for a few weeks popped into our minds so we went to visit them. The mom was suffering from some pretty serious health issues and we were able to talk with her and make her laugh. After a little bit of conversation she opened up to us about some things that had been weighing on her. We weren't really able to help her at all with them but we were able to tell her we loved her and her family and we were always there for her and that most especially God was here for her. There was such a strong feeling of God's love as we talked and she thanks us so much. We drove away feeling so uplifted and happy when we hadn't done anything. I love that feeling so much.

Alex!!

I wood burned this for a member with Papa P's wood burner

 Young Men

 Brighton